The Turner Ink blog contains rants, bloopers, observations and opinions. It also has handy tips on grammar and punctuation such as colons: semicolons; and full stops. As well as some very useful ‘how tos’. Feel free to leave comments. Be nice though.
Continuing our occasional series where we look at the reasons why techie types shouldn’t be allowed to write copy. Hmmmm. So what is it you do exactly?
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Tags: bad copy, jargon
Posted in Bloopers, Copywriting, Website & SEO copywriting | 
2 Comments »
Is there anything more tedious than waiting for your baggage at the airport? It’s enough to make your holiday joie de vivre go right out the window.
So there I was at London’s Gatwick Airport at the weekend, waiting with breathless anticipation for my case to arrive, when I spied this ad for Gatwick Express, the fast train service into central London.
It’s not the ad so much that bemused me as the strapline: ‘anything else is a risk’.
What? Risks are normally associated with going on holiday and not having medical insurance. Or missing your mortgage repayments and getting your home repossessed. Or driving around without motor insurance and hoping you don’t crash into anything.
But using another mode of transport, other than Gatwick Express, seems like a perfectly safe and risk-free option.
Sure, the other trains may take a little longer. The Express takes only 30 minutes after all. But it does cost a whopping £16.50. (At least.)
The local train services, on the other hand, cost between £7.90 and £10.90 and take 35 to 45 minutes. And they’ll get you there in perfect comfort – even if they do take a few minutes longer.
You can even take a coach. Only £7.30. Or a bus for two quid. What a bargain!
So as far as I can tell, all the other options seem unrisky.
What is Gatwick Express going on about then? Are they saying that because they offer a fast, direct service, there’s less likely to be hold-ups, delays or traffic jams? And if you really have to be in central London super-fast-quick, for a very important meeting, than this is the way to go?
Why not say that then? How about:
The fastest way to central London
Your first class journey continues
Next stop: central London
Or
Gatwick to London non-stop
They took me all of five minutes to think of, and all seem infinitely better than ‘anything else is a risk’.
Got a good strapline for Gatwick Express? Leave it in the comments.
Tags: straplines
Posted in Bloopers, Copywriting, Marketing | 1 Comment »
Clearing out some old magazines and newspapers this week, I came across this great little ad from Hiscox, a UK based insurance company.
The ad explains how they believe in straightforward jargon-free policies and how they’re committed to using plain English. Hooray. Couldn’t we all do with a bit of plain ol’ English from our insurance companies?
Now I don’t about you, but when I come to renew my contents insurance I’ll probably give these guys a buzz.
Check out their website as well. Good stuff.
Tags: headlines, jargon
Posted in Copywriting | 1 Comment »
When it comes to planning copy, copywriters, me included, love a good acronym. Anything that helps us keep the message focussed and tight. Back in the day I was taught to use AIDA: Attention, Interest, Desire and Action.
Grab your customers’ attention with a good, pithy headline which pulls them into the piece. Create interest by demonstrating your product; telling your readers you understand their problems; and getting them involved.
Create desire, want, and need by showing how your product will solve their problems. And show how other people have found your product or service useful, life-changing, indispensable.
Then get them to take action. Summarise the problem you’re solving and then tell them what to do next. Buy this product now and get a free widget. Call now for a quote. Click here for your download.
So that’s AIDA. But now I prefer to use the 4P’s. Promise. Picture. Proof. Push. It’s more descriptive, goes a little deeper than AIDA and is easier to remember.
Promise
Rather than getting attention purely for the sake of it, perhaps with a shocking or unbelievable headline, promise tells your reader exactly what they’re going to get. It shows what’s in it for them. It sets your stall out. It says ‘read on ‘cos you’re gonna love what’s coming up.’
Picture
Picture puts your readers right in the thick of it by creating a believable scene in their heads. It explains the benefits. And it shows you understand the pain or problem they’re experiencing. You want your reader to think ‘oh my, that’s exactly what I’m feeling’.
For example:
Imagine dropping a dress size in time for your holiday
Finding a new job can be stressful, right?
How does a 50% increase in your monthly income sound?
Ever wondered how to feed a family of four for under a tenner?
Proof
Show them how it’s done with proof. Explain the features. And how it works. Testimonials, charts, video demonstrations, case studies and success stories all show how the promise you made at the beginning has come to fruition. Your customers are looking for proof. Saying ‘we think we’re really good at what we do’ just won’t cut it.
Push
Push is the big drum roll. It’s where you summarise the benefits and ask for a purchase or some other action. Don’t be afraid of the big push. This is what sales copy is about after all. By the time you’ve promised, pictured and ‘proofed’ – pushing your reader into action should be a doddle.
Tags: 4P's, promise picture proof push
Posted in Copywriting, Website & SEO copywriting | 1 Comment »
We’re all familiar with the Apple iPhone ads. (You’re not? Where have you been?)
Those TV and press ads, where they discuss all the apps you can get at the Apple App Store for your iPhone. There’s an app for dividing a restaurant bill. An app for finding out where your friends are. And an app for discovering if you’re a moron or not. (Seriously. Currently only 99c instead of the usual $2.99. Go to the Apple App Store to download your app now.)
We all know that app is short for application. But it used to be a bit of a geeky word didn’t it? And not an actual real word.
But have you noticed it’s now become mainstream? Not app. with a full stop to show it’s been shortened. But just app on its own. As bold as you like.
And despite the fact it’s acknowledged by most online dictionaries as ‘an informal and shortened version of computer application’, and not an actual word, I’m with Apple on this one.
Because advertising copywriting is all about using the language of the people you’re trying to reach. (And with Apple iPhones, users are more likely to be 18-24, male, and from an affluent urban background. And trust me they’re gonna use the word app.) It’s not about using perfect English. If a word has moved into everyday use but has not yet reached the Oxford English Dictionary, so what? Use it anyway.
Which only leaves one question: what app shall I download today? The abs workout or Peggle?
Tags: straplines, words
Posted in Copywriting, Word stuff | No comments yet »
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